The spring semester is starting up soon and the thing I'm looking forward to least of all is going food shopping with my apartmentmates. Yes, that sounds quite stupid. But allow me to explain. One of my roommates has a judgmental side that comes out every time we go grocery shopping together. As I grab things off the shelves and place them in the cart she will gaze down at the item, raise her eyes to meet mine, and occasionally make a negative comment. She sometimes attempts to sway me and our other roommate to place the item under scrutiny back on the shelf. I know that I am blessed in the fact that I will graduate college loan free, and I know that there is hardly a person I know who will be so blessed. When I assumed that my roommate was disapproving of the food I wished to purchase because we split the bill and she wanted to keep it small, I offered to pay for my own items. I've told her three times that she need not pay for anything she wasn't going to use or eat. Still, she continued having an opinion about what I wanted to buy and sometimes even get angry about it. To make matters worse, her boyfriend is even more judgmental than she is and she has brought him along food shopping with us on more than one occasion This man doesn't just glare at me, but actually plucks my items out of the cart one by one to study them and then question them and ask me to explain why I want them.
I have never felt self conscious about what I've eaten but when there is someone in your ear, questioning everything you eat, you start to feel a little depressed. I've gotten into confrontations with almost every roommate I've ever had and to me this was not something worth having a confrontation over. So I kept my mouth shut and dealt with my roommate in my own way. When we went food shopping I would add hardly a thing to the cart, simply because I had no energy to deal with all the bull that was being thrown my way. And in consequence of that I'd get hungry and have not enough food to satisfy that hunger. Obviously, this didn't last long. After a few weeks I got fed up and just tossed whatever I wanted in the cart.
It may seem like I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill, and that may be true. But I've never felt self conscious about my weight. I love my curves. I think they're beautiful. I've never had to question my curves before I went grocery shopping with my roommate. It's people like that who make people question their beauty. And if I, the mother of self-love, questioned that love that I had for myself for even a second, then I can only imagine how my roommate would make some other young woman feel about herself. I don't ever go after a woman about her weight. Beauty comes in every shape and size. My boyfriend reminds me all the time how beautiful he thinks I am, regardless of my love handles, my untoned butt, or anything else society says isn't sexy. He thinks they're beautiful and so do I. I wish there were more people in the world like him. There is no greater person than someone who makes others feel good about themselves.
Forever the honest,
Stephanie Lato
Hmm. I want to be the first to comment on your awesome new blog. But I also want to actually put a thoughtful response. I had nothing to say on the Disney channel one, so here I am.
ReplyDeleteAt my school we were lucky enough to have a cafeteria that actually made pretty decent and diverse food. And since the meal plan was affordable, unlimited amounts of supply was pretty readily accessible. It was also a place to hang out and meet up with people at the end of the day. So unfortunately, to keep busy while chatting with friends, I would keep going back for more and more food. And it wouldn't even be a normal meal. It would be like spaghetti, spaghetti, salad, cookies, bowl of cereal, fish, spaghetti, muffin, ice cream.
The person judging me most was myself. And clearly this story has no point. However, I do agree with you that you can eat whatever you want and live your life anyway you want. If your roommates don't like it, then...give them pink eye.